Degrading The Lion
by Redrum
Summary: COMPLETE: Squall has a new boyfriend, but Seifer isn't to happy about him. Could something be going on behind doors that no one but Squall and his boyfriend know about?
1. Dylan

2/10/03  
  
Disclaimer: Squaresoft owns the FF8 characters, and I created Dylan, or "The Bastard" as Seifer would like to call him.  
  
Notes: Sorry if Seifer or Squall seem out of character, but I believe that time matures a person.. somewhat anyway. And with certain events that take place, I think Squall has every right to act out of character.  
  
Chapter 1: Dylan  
  
[Squall]  
  
My head hits the cold wall with a sickening crack. My body slumps to the floor, and the man standing over me looks down at me with anger. His hard, dark brown eyes, almost black pierce my flesh. His gaze is enough to cause me pain. So is the throbbing ache that resides in my head. His full peach lips curl back in disgust, delivering a sharp kick to my stomach with his heavy black hiking boots. When he feels that I have been dealt with properly he turns sharply, and bidding me a careless wave he leaves my dorm.  
  
My breathing is unsteady, and a dull ache can be felt throughout my whole being. Luckily there is no blood, as he doesn't usually like to leave a mark behind. Or rather.. he doesn't care to leave a mark on me, but he doesn't want to mar any of the areas around us. By some miracle my skull has managed to keep intact from the rather hard beating, and no blood is to be found pooling beneath me.  
  
Sighing quietly, I huddle into myself for warmth and drift off to sleep. Content at the moment to just sleep and take a shower when I wake up. I shouldn't be feeling any more beatings until the next weekend. That is, if he doesn't suddenly change his schedule around. I'll still be seeing him tomorrow for lunch, and he'll be expecting me to be clean and acting as though nothing has happened. And like I always do, I will put up my facade and no one else but us will know of the events that take place in this room, and many more.  
  
[Seifer]  
  
God, how I hate that man. There's something off about him. He seems to.. ugh, I don't know! He just doesn't seem right. But if Squall likes him then I guess that's enough for me. It was a surprise to all of us when Squall came out of the closest, so to speak. But with recent events it wasn't that big of a deal. I came back to Garden after the sorceress wars, and was placed as the lowest ranking SeeD. But I was a SeeD, and that was good enough for me. When I came back I was surprised at the number of people who accepted me, sure there are those who will never forgive me, but their few and far between. And let me tell you, that was a surprise to me.  
  
Anyway, he's sitting across from me right now. Damn bastard has his right arm wrapped possessively over Squall's shoulder, and is talking to Zell. The cafeteria's pretty quiet at the moment since it's only the morning. Quistis and Selphie are talking about something to do with the Garden Festival again, and Irvine is pretending to listen to them. Rinoa is staring intently at Dylan while he talks to Zell about the animals in the training centre. It's damn obvious how much she likes him. Squall has his head resting against Dylan's shoulder while he quietly sips his morning coffee.  
  
"I really think they should get some of the higher level monsters in there. Even the T-rex's don't hold much of a challenge anymore." Yeah, like you can even beat a T-rex, asshole. "Oh yeah, I know what you mean. After we came back from the SS war nothing in the training centre was all that tough. Maybe some of us should send a complaint to Cid?" I flinch slightly at the mention of the SS war, but I have to agree that the monsters don't pose much of a threat anymore. "If Cid upgraded the monsters then the junior cadets wouldn't stand a chance of beating any of them and they wouldn't be able to get any experience. For those that are to strong for the training centre it's more like a stress relief thing then to gain experience, since we have enough of it." Definitely a good point Squally-boy. Never thought of it that way before. I guess it's true though, since I like to go in there at night to relieve excess tension.  
  
"That's not the way I see it." My eyes narrow slightly as Dylan squeezes Squall's shoulder so much that he flinches, and his dark brown eyes stare intently into Squall's. The tense brunette mumbles something that I don't catch, though taking it to be something good since Dylan smiles brightly and kisses him on the forehead.  
  
"Aww, their so cute!" Selphie cries brightly, I look over at her to see her bouncing in her seat, much like a five year old watching their favourite TV show. Quistis nods her head in agreement, and Rinoa just stares..  
  
"I actually think he has a point. What's the point of having a training facility if the younger cadets can't train. It's not like we can just send them outside to fight the monsters in the forest." Dylan's eyes slowly meet mine, I almost flinch at the hatred in them. "Oh really, I don't recall asking your opinion." I shake my head angrily. "It's a free country mate, and everyone can say what they want to say whenever they want to say it." Irvine's voice drawls. I smirk in his direction and nod my head in thanks. He smiles at me handsomely and goes back to pretending to drift off into sleep, pulling his hat down over his face.  
  
"You don't even come from this country buddy! So who the hell are you to tell me what I can and can not say?" "Actually he didn't tell you what you could or couldn't say, he merely said that it's a free country and Seifer can express his opinion if he wants to." Wait a go chickie. Didn't even know you had the brain capacity to follow the conversation for this long.  
  
Dylan looks at all of us, his cold brown eyes narrowed in anger. "Come on Squall, let's get out of here." Squall raises his head slightly, looking like he was about to protest. Dylan gets up fast and pulls Squall with him roughly. I flinch slightly at the rough treatment, but Squall doesn't seem to mind so I let it go.  
  
"C-ya ladies." Rinoa giggles slightly as Dylan smiles at her. Grabbing Squall with muscular arms he drags him out of the cafeteria. As soon as the couple is out of ear sought Zell pipes up. "Fuck, I hate that guy!" I see Irvine's head nod slightly underneath the large cowboy hat. "I think he's nice." Oh shut up Rinoa, it's not like your opinion isn't biased. Dumb female.  
  
"Unfortunately I have to agree with Chickenwuss, Dylan's an ass. He doesn't deserve Leonhart." Violet eyes peak up at me from underneath an overhanging hat. I look down to avoid Irvine's piercing gaze.  
  
"Everyone's good enough for Squall. I don't think he deserves Dylan." Irvine, Zell and I look at Rinoa sharply. Where the hell did that comment come from? "You bitch! Dylan doesn't deserve Squall! Just like you don't deserve anyone!" Muttering more obscenities Zell walks out of the cafeteria, followed by Irvine. Standing up abruptly I follow their lead and make my way out of the cafe. "Where you going Seifer?" Quistis, why don't you just mind your own business. I know you still have that crush on Squall and I but you don't need to know where we are every second of every day. "Hey! Don't walk away from me when I'm talking to you!" Go fuck yourself Instructor. "Watch your language!" Oops, guess I said that one out loud. 


	2. In My Rival's Arms

Chapter 2: In My Rival's Arms  
  
[Squall]  
  
"What the hell was that all about?!" Dylan yelled at me, all but dragging me down the hallway. I looked around nervously, luckily no one was in the corridors at the moment. Dylan's usually more careful about yelling at me in the halls, but he must be really angry. His face is flushed and I can see a small vein pulsing in his neck.  
  
"Haven't I told you before? In public you are never to talk unless I tell you to, and never ever talk back to me!" I whimper in fear and pain. Dylan is twisting my arm, it feels like it's about to be pulled out of the socket. Though it's not like he hasn't done it before.  
  
"Shit!" Dylan turns sharply at hearing a scruff of boots on the cold floor, and loosing his grip on me I collapse to the ground. "Hey!" I know that voice "You okay Leonhart? What the hell are you doing on the floor?" I don't know Seifer, I really don't know...  
  
[Seifer]  
  
When I left the cafeteria I was trying to look for Squall, when I recognized Dylan's voice coming from the closest hall way. Turning the corner sharply I'm surprised to see Dylan nearly tearing Squall's arm off while yelling at him. My black hard soled shoes clip against the tiled floor, alerting Dylan of my presence. Letting go of his tight grip on Squall he turns to face me.  
  
"Hey! You okay Leonhart? What the hell are you doing on the floor?" My long stride soon take me to the couple in a matter of seconds that really feel like hours.  
  
I feel Dylan's piercing gaze on me as I kneel to meet the collapsed brunette. His arm is twisted at an odd angle and I'm surprised he isn't screaming in pain. It looks pretty painful to me. "What happened?" I keep my voice low enough for only Squall and I to hear. Placing a hand on his (unhurt) shoulder I wait for an answer that I probably already know. "I fell." Shaking my head sadly I put an arm under his knees and my left arm behind his back, hefting him up (as gently as possible) I stand to face Dylan with Squall in my arms.  
  
[Dylan]  
  
What the hell is he doing? He can't touch my Squall! I can take care of him myself, I don't need Seifer putting his nose where it doesn't belong. "What are you doing?" I try to get my anger under control. I gradually feel my face lost it's warmth and that annoying little vein in my neck decrease in size. I easily meet Seifer's eyes with a warm smile.  
  
[Seifer]  
  
Yeah, like I can't tell that's not a fake smile. Asshole, I'm not stupid. You may be able to fool Rinoa and the other girls, but you can't fool me.  
  
[Dylan]  
  
"Not that it's any of your business, but I'm taking him to the infirmary. Or were you just planning on leaving him lying here in the middle of the hallway, hurt?" Shaking my head in rising frustration I step forward to take Squall into my arms. "Nuh, uh. I don't thinks so pal. I'm taking him to the infirmary, and I'm not going to cause him any more pain by standing here talking to you." I watch as Seifer turns sharply and setting a quick pace he makes his way to the infirmary.  
  
Oh well, one more job I don't have to do. But I'll be 'talking' to Squall about letting Seifer touch him, he knows no one else is allowed to touch him but me. Of course I'll 'talk' to him when he's better, I don't want more people on my ass for 'upsetting' Squall when I 'talk' to him.  
  
[Squall]  
  
I don't hear Seifer and Dylan's conversation while I'm in Seifer's warm embrace. I feel incredibly tired as I rest my head against Seifer's neck. The only thing I feel before I go off into a deep sleep is the slight jarring of my body as the blonde makes his way to whatever destination. And Seifer shivering slightly every time my heated breath caresses his bare neck.  
  
It's been so long since I've felt even the slightest bit of protection that I almost forgot what it felt like to be held and comforted. Dylan use to do it all the time, but now I don't really feel safe in his arms. Not dwelling on the thought of being able to feel safe in my rival's arms, I sleep a dreamless sleep. 


	3. Behind Closed Doors

Notes: I think after this chapter I might start having problems.. I don't really know what to write for when Irvine, Zell, Seifer and Squall train.. I would appreciate any help and ideas you can give me for the next chapter.  
  
Chapter 3: Behind Closed Doors  
  
[Seifer]  
  
Squall's been out of it for a few hours now. Dr. Kadowaki gave him some sort of pain killer that obviously made him tired, so now she's looking into another kind of drug that won't put him to sleep. When I brought him in here Dr. Kadowaki took one looks at him and then at my face, shaking her head she didn't ask any questions. Just said to put him in one of the beds while she went to get a sling. After a healing potion she put his arm into the sling "to make sure he didn't put excess tension on it" she said.  
  
"Here." Handing me a bottle of tylenol (I wonder why she didn't give Squall that stuff to begin with..) she sent us on our way. Nudging Squall I wait for him to rub the sleep out of his eyes with only one hand, before speaking. "Hey, let's get out of here Leonhart." Making sure to keep my voice low enough that it doesn't agitate the major headache I know he has.  
  
[Squall]  
  
I look over at Seifer and I almost smile in thanks for keeping his voice down. My head is throbbing, I must have hit it when I fell. Swinging my legs to the side of the bed, I rise to my feet carefully. Still a little wobbly on my feet I pitch forward into Seifer's waiting arms. He sets me right, and swinging an arm casually around my shoulder (I thank him silently for his strength) he guides me out the doors and back to my own dorm.  
  
****  
  
I collapse onto the bed, my whole body relaxes when I meet the comfort that only comes when I'm in my own room with the door securely locked from the outside world.  
  
"So Leonhart.. care to tell me what happened back there?" I jump slightly when I realize that Seifer must have followed me in here without my knowing. Looking over at him sitting at the end of my bed, I try not to wince at the knowing look his jade green eyes hold.  
  
"I fell." He snorts quietly and shakes his head. "I was there Leonhart, I saw Dylan twisting your arm." My eyes narrow. "Then why bother asking if you saw the whole thing?" He smirks.  
  
"Just wanted to see if you were actually going to confess. But I guess not, since you just lied to me about how you broke your arm." I start to protest before he raises his hand "Yeah, yeah. I know you don't really lie. You just twisted the truth a bit. 'cause in all reality you did fall, you just didn't state that someone else made you fall." I huff in agitation. Taking the sling off my healed arm I throw it at Seifer's head. His booming laughter echoes throughout the room. "Don't have a hissy fit now, wouldn't do good for your reputation." Taking the sling off his head he tosses it to the floor. "Now.. tell me what's been going on between you and Dylan." His eyes show a surprising amount of concern, and I find myself parting my lips in speech, to tell him exactly what's been going on behind closed doors.  
  
"Dylan... I know he doesn't mean to but... he hi-" A knock at the door cuts me off. I sigh in relief and curse myself for almost telling Seifer about Dylan and I. I tense when Seifer gets off the bed angrily, swearing loudly he unlocks and opens the door so hard that it crashes against the opposite wall.  
  
[Seifer]  
  
Damn it! He was about to tell me, and now I'm never going to be able to get it out of him. The loud crash of the door meeting the wall does little to calm me, when I come face to face with Dylan. "Hey, just thought I'd check on Squall. To see how he's doing and all." I almost growl when he smiles pleasantly, as though nothing wrong had accord in the halls. Trying to surpass my anger I step aside to let the bastard in. He breezes by me, his shoulder knocking into mine so hard that it's obvious it wasn't a mistake. Making his way to Squall's bed he sits down, being careful not to dislodge him to much. I snort quietly, but stay quiet other wise. Closing the door silently, and I lean against it to watch Dylan tending to Squall.  
  
I can't believe I used to think that the relationship made Squall happy, since he always seemed to smile when Dylan wrapped his arms around him. But looking back on it now, I can remember seeing Dylan's arms squeezing Squall's waist oddly, and then Squall would be smiling. It would never reach his eyes, but I thought that was just the normal 'Squall smile' that I never got to see. God.. I wish I could have seen this earlier. Maybe I could have warned Squall before he got into this kind of relationship. Or I could have threatened Dylan somehow into leaving Garden and leaving Squall before he got too close to him.  
  
"Hey Seifer, can you leaving us alone for awhile?" I snap out of my train of thought to stare Dylan in the eye unblinkingly. "No." His eyes narrow slightly, but his frown quickly vanishes when Squall's grey blue eyes travel in his direction again. Instead he smiles brightly, and shakes his head. "Well, I guess I'll be going then. Hope that arm heals soon Squall." I snort in disgust when Dylan hungrily covers Squall's mouth with his. I fight not to look away when I see tongues in action. Squall pulls back quickly when he realizes that I still haven't left and he's kissing Dylan in front of me. I almost smile when I see the bright flush spread across his porcelain cheeks. Dylan scowls. Quickly getting up and strides over to me and narrows his eyes. "Can you move please?" I debate in saying no, but seeing Squall over his shoulder, cheeks still red I nod mutely and let him pass. Stepping out into the hall slightly I make sure he turns the corner before I go back in to try to talk to Squall again.  
  
"I already told you Almasy, I fell. And that's all. I'm healed now anyway, so what does it matter?" I shake my head, it does matter Squall... it matters to me.  
  
"It doesn't matter Leonhart. But I'm just curious as to see if your ever planning on telling us the truth." He frowns slightly, all traces of the blush now gone. His eyes refuse to meet mine, instead staring at the hands in his lap.  
  
"Remember our meeting?" He nods slightly. "Good. Meet us in the training centre entrance and remember to wait for Irvine, Zell or I to be there before you go in. Don't want you fighting a T-Rex when your not at your peak. Well, c-ya." Taking one last look at the brunette, I slowly leave the room, making sure to close the door securely behind me. Hopefully he remembers to lock it. Ah, hell. What does it matter? He'll let Dylan in anyway, he doesn't seem to realize the danger he's in if he stays in this relationship any longer. If I can't convince Squall to leave Dylan, maybe Zell or Irvine can. Even though I hate having the knowledge that Squall doesn't trust me enough to believe me when I say that he can do better the Dylan... 


	4. Jaws of Death

Chapter 4: Jaws of Death  
  
[Squall]  
  
I've been waiting here for an hour, don't they have any sense of time? I can't wait here forever, Dylan will go looking for me. I told him I was training with Zell, Irvine and Seifer but he was really reluctant for me to go. It's sweet that he's thinking of my injuries, but I'm actually feeling fine. Maybe a little light headed, but I'll be okay.  
  
"Hey, Squall!" Turning swiftly I find Zell, Irvine and Seifer striding up to me. About time. "Leonhart, we got caught up. We can't help it if your always on time." I snort quietly. Yeah, just like you can't help always being late. "Whatever. Let's go." Striding to one of the Training Centre doors I push open the heavy metal doors with minimual effort. The doors close with a loud crash, announching our presence to the monsters dwlling inside.  
  
"Couldn't you have been a little quieter?" Like you could do any better Zell. "We want them to get roudy, so it's good to announce our presence chicken- wuss. We want them to come to us annoyed and pissed off." My lips twitch in the smallest of smirks, my thoughts exactly.  
  
[Seifer]  
  
About time, we've been in here for the past hour and we've fought enough Grats to fill the Training Centre. Unfortunetly, their not a challenge. The only thing remote to a challenge in this place is the T-rex's. So at the moment everyone but Irvine (since he's a long distance fighter) has Grat guts all over them.  
  
Turning around another corner we come face to face with three T-rex's. We were so glad to face them that I think we all had a smile on our faces. Even Squall smirked slightly. Lining up in our usual formation (Irvine in the back, Zell, me and Squall in that order), we tensed ourselves for a long awaited battle. Glancing over at Squall for a signal I notice him panting slightly but dismiss it, since were all kind of tired. He notices me staring at him and nods his head slightly. I smirk in anitcipation. Since were the only gunbladers it makes sense that Squall and I work well together, especially since were always training together.  
  
With Hyperion held at thigh level, I rush forward. Squall holds his in the same manner, only being that Lionheart rests near his right thigh instead. His long legs leave the ground at the exact same time as mine. We run towards the middle T-rex, so in sync that even our hearts beat in the same fast rythm.  
  
A surge of adrenaline flows through my veins, just before I raise Hyperion to strike. We bring our blades through the flesh easily, the rex's blood splatters on us as our gunblades meet in the center of the beast's stomach. For a split second the other two monsters are silent, and then the torso of the rex slides off of his legs. Both body parts make a sickening thug when they meet the soft earth. Squall and I don't waste time gloating over the kill, instead we leap back into formation.  
  
Irvine fires a few rounds of pulse ammo, they hit the left beast, breaking the skin but not creating an exit wound. Cocking his gun, Irvine sets it on his shoulder, a clear signal for Zell to go ahead (they usually train together every other day).  
  
With amazing speed and agility Zell rushes forward, the sound of bones crunching beneath his clenched fists registers to my ears. Leaping back Zell goes back to his place. The rex roars in pain, and finally having a clear shot to attack they both rush forward. The left one goes after Zell and Irvine, his tail sweeping them off their feet. The one attack zaps the rest of his strength away and he collapses in a pool of blood. Zell and Irvine are unconscious, their heads having collided too hard with the ground beneath them. Not having any G.F's on us, we barely spare them a glance as we both rush forward.  
  
I crouch low to the ground, swinging Hyperion in a wide arc toward our opponent. A thick leathery tail sweeps my off balance. I stumble backward before regaining my balance. My eyes widen in horror as I watch the scene before me.  
  
Razor sharp teeth wrap around Squall's frail torso. Large jaws clamp down hard, swinging it's enormous head back and forth viciously. I scream in outrage and rush forward. Hyperion glows an emerald green as my limit break surges through the black metal.  
  
Panting heavily I rush forward to pry Squall out of the dead T-rex's jaws. He moans in pain, and I try to lift the jaw out of him. Proving to be too heavy to lift they crash down again, Squall screams as more blood pours out of the puncture wounds. Wincing at his agonizing scream, I bring my blade up and carefully cut the jaws, disembodying it from the rest of the head. Dragging Squall a little ways from the wreckage I once again try to lift the jaw off of him. Proving easier then before, I let the top jaw fall to the ground. Turning him onto his stomach, almost regretting the move when Squall's eyes begin to water and he moans pitifully. Quickly prying the bottom jaw off of him I turn him over again and lift him into my arms. Gently hugging him to my chest I carefully walk over to Zell and Irvine, both are moaning slightly as they get to their feet.  
  
"Squall! What the hell happened?" I jester with my head towards the carcass of the T-rex with no jaws and I quickly turn to make my way out of the Training Centre. "Squall won't want to go to the infirmary." Stopping, I turn my head in the direction of Zell's voice. "I know." That's why I'm heading to my dorm, where I keep my G.F. sphere. I have to hurry, I'm afraid that Squall's losing way to much blood. He's pretty tiny, and doesn't have that much in him to begin with. 


	5. Safe Haven

Chapter 5: Safe Haven

Seifer

Drawing Ifrit from the G.F. sphere, I junction quickly and make my way over to Squall. Standing beside the large bed I place a hand on the brunette's bloody torso. Muttering numerous Curas, blue sparks dance over Squall's pale form. His body jerks as the Curas take affect. His eyes flicker open, and he whispers something that makes my heart brake, taking a quiet breath he falls asleep. A much needed sleep I'm sure.

"Please don't let Dylan find me." That one whispered confession stays with me through out the day as I sit by Squall's side, only getting up to relieve myself..

Having watched him for several hours I find my eye lids drooping against my will. After numerous times of nearly dozing off, I finally give in and leaning down I rest my head in my crossed arms on top of the soft bed.

Squall

I open my eyes a sliver to see Seifer, with his head resting on his arms near me. Blinking the sleep from my vision, I sit up gingerly, careful not to move the bed too much. I sigh in relief when I don't feel any of the pain I was experiencing last night. God that was hell. I was so weary from all the blood loss, still am a bit. Have you ever had the experience of getting ripped around like a rag doll? I thought not. It's hurts like a son of a bitch. There's no other way to explain the excruciating pain I was in.

I'm lucky Seifer healed me in time. I think any longer and I would have died. I'm not looking forward to leaving this safe haven though. The only place I feel safe is in Seifer's dorm room. Where Dylan can't go..

It's not that I don't love him. It's just a twisted love I guess. He hurts me, but he shows me a caring side that I could never hope to receive from anyone else. With Dylan I can believe for those few moments when he doesn't hurt me that he really does love me. I've never been loved by anyone, and it's nice to know that he loves me. When he's not hurting me anyway. It's not his fault he beats me, I ask for it with the way I behave sometimes. Most people think it's the other way around, but it's my fault. I'm the one that provokes him. If I go against his rules then it's only right that I should be taught a lesson.

I just hope Dylan can forgive me for spending this much time away from him. With Seifer of all people, the one person he's jealous of. He's never told me that, but I can see it in his eyes when ever Seifer talks to me. Though there's always a deep hate in his brown eyes whenever anyone talks to me. It just seems more.. brutal when directed at Seifer. I hope to God he doesn't try to hurt Seifer. I'd willingly take the place of Seifer if someone tried to hurt him. I wonder if I would do the same for Dylan?-of course I would.

Shaking my head at my fruitless thoughts, I let my eyes glaze over as I turn to the window. Watching the sun's golden rays sweep across the midnight blue sky. I wait for Seifer to wake up.

Seifer

I groan and sit up slowly. Rubbing the back of my neck, trying to get the kinks out. My gaze travels to the muscular brunette who is staring out the window. The sun is already high up in the sky, and he appears to be lost in thought.

"Leonhart-"

"I think you can call me Squall now, considering you've saved my life twice." I smirk slightly

"And you never once said 'thank you' might I add." He glances at me briefly

"Thanks.." It's so quiet that I see it fall off his lips rather then hear the soft spoken voice.

"Yeah well, it was nothing. Anyway, like I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted." His eyes narrow in my direction and I chuckle slightly. "I think we should go down to the cafeteria to get some food, I haven't eating in awhile and I'm sure you haven't in a long time, judging by how skinny you look right now. So are you okay with going to the caf.?" He nods slightly, not bothering to contradict what he already knows is true about his appearance.


	6. Confused Blonde

Edit 01/12/05 - NC17 content has been removed in this chapter. If you wish to see the complete version go to or search 'Redrum' under google or some other search engine.

Chapter 6: Confused Blonde

Seifer

Oh shit! Dylan's right there! Glancing back, I see Squall's eyes widen slightly and tensing he starts to turn. Grabbing his arm roughly but being careful not to hit any sore spots I pull him along. He's going to have to face the bastard sometime. So why not with me at his side? Just incase the bastard tries anything..

"Squall!" Dylan stands abruptly and racing over to us he grabs Squall out of my lose grip. My eyes widen in surprise as Dylan drags him to the table. I frown slightly when I see Squall wince from Dylan grabbing none to gently on his fragile arm. I quickly walk over to the table to join the two.

"It's good to see your better baby. I missed you." Squall smiles shyly and I feel my blood boil when Dylan leans in to give Squall a rather heated kiss.

"Seifer! Squall! Great timing ne?" I brake my gaze from their lip lock to see Irvine and Zell striding towards us. Squall turns his head to greet his two friends, and Dylan wraps a possessive arm around his shoulders when he brakes the kiss rather reluctantly.

"Hey Irvine, Zell." The two men sit on either side of Dylan and Squall, I nod my head in acknowledgement. I notice Dylan looks slightly nervous now that there's three of us sitting here, the only people who aren't fooled by his act. Zell turns to Squall and tries to smile even as he sees the way Dylan's arm tightens around the brunette's shoulder, causing him to wince again.

"How are you feeling Squall?" He parts his lips to speak, but Dylan quickly cuts him off. "He's fine Zell." The blonde's eyes narrow in anger, a look I'm well accustomed too but I've never seen it look so violent before. "I think he can answer for himself Dylan." Irvine drawls from his place beside the bastard. Dylan shoots a look at the two and turning to Squall he leans over to whisper something in the brunette's ear. I see Squall's brows furrow, but he nods his head. They both stand up, and Squall gives me a look before the two leave the cafeteria. There was something in those smoke blue eyes, but I don't know what..

I jump slightly when the table almost topples over, Zell's fist having smashed into it. "Man, I hate that guy! He's controlling Squall and Squall just goes along with it, like it's an everyday thing." I nod my head in agreement but stay silent. Maybe I should mind my own business? It's not like Squall can't take care of himself.. right? Damn it! Squall can't take care of himself! In any other situation he'd be able to, but when it comes to relationships he's always vulnerable in them. He thinks he loves Dylan, but he's just confused. At least.. I hope so. I don't think I should interfere if Squall really does love Dylan.. but then again Leonhart has a bad track record for relationships. He probably doesn't even know what real love is. He doesn't know that in a loving relationship you don't get hit, you get protected from things like that. I'm so fucking confused..

"Hey, Seifer?" I bring my head up to meet Zell's eyes. "Are you going to do anything about their relationship?" I frown slightly. "I don't know Zell.. I don't know."

Squall

Dylan's arm was slung over my shoulders as we walked down the halls to his dorm. I know I was going to get in trouble for greeting Zell and Irvine like that. And the time I spent with Seifer would not go unpunished. He already told me the rules, and it's my fault I broke them. It's only right that he punish me.

"Squall!" Dylan tenses slightly before he swings us around to face Rinoa. "Hello Rinoa." I can never tell if his smiles are real or not... but Rinoa seems to like it so maybe it is. "Hey Dylan.. Squall." I almost shudder at the loathing in her voice. I never knew she hated me that much. I tried to let her down gently when she thought she was my girlfriend. It's not like I can help being gay. She seems to like Dylan a lot though.

"So what are you up to?" Rinoa leans forward slightly, and puts her hands behind her back, thrusting her chest out. I glance up to see Dylan's brown eyes glued to the exposed flesh of her chest. I never knew he was bi.. or maybe he's losing interest in me.

"Squall and I were just heading to my room." He winks down at me, and I have to control myself from shuddering at the malice in his eyes. I look down to avoid both their gazes. I cringe slightly when I hear Rinoa's ear piercing giggle ring in my ears. "Oh! You have fun now." Dylan's laugher is quiet and his words are full of double meaning. "Oh I plan to have fun." Rinoa giggles again and she heads towards the girl's chambers, swinging her hips so wide that it looks unnatural and she stumbles slightly when she walks. I probably would have laughed had it not been for the consistent pulling on my arm to follow Dylan to his room.

Dylan

I pull Squall into my room and lock the door with a solid click. I watch Squall silently make his way towards the bed, sitting gingerly on the edge. God, how he looks so pretty. So perfect..

Striding over to him, I stand with my arms crossed over my large chest. "Strip." I smirk in satisfaction as I watch Squall bare his pale flesh to me. So delicious. So pure. Like virgin snow. So white and pure you just want to mar the surface.

Squall now sits on the bed, naked as the day he was born. Waiting for my command. At least he's learned his lesson from last time. He knows in bed he's not supposed to do anything unless I command it so. "Lye spread eagle on the bed." He does so without hesitation. I half circle the bed, my eyes never leaving his bared flesh as I reach into the nightstand's drawer to retrieve the cuffs.

Straddling his hips I pull one arm up to the middle bed post. I quickly do the same with the other arm. Both fragile wrists hang limp, trying not to cut themselves on the rough metal of the hand cuffs.

Leaning back, I sit my full weight on top of his taught stomach. Smooth ribs just out from the skin, creating pleasant shadows over the smooth pale flesh. I rest one hand on his chest and with my other I tweak a small peach nub into hardness. Squall's lashes flutter, and his eyelids slowly part to reveal dark grey irises. His breath hitches as his gaze locks with mine.

"What did you do wrong?" My voice is low, but it fills the heavy silence of the bedroom. Squall sighs quietly but answers in a voice no louder then a whisper. "I let Seifer touch me." I growl slightly. "What else?" Squall frowns, trying to remember. My anger growing, I twist his hardened nipple. The brunette cries out in pain. A small trickle of blood can be seen around the red area.

"I spoke out of turn. I stayed the night with Seifer when I should have come to you to heal myself." I slap him across the face, his head bounces against his arm as it is flung to the side. "Do you deserve punishment?" He nods slowly. "Answer me!" I yell, my patience all but running out. I push down harder against his chest until I hear him wheeze.

"Yes!" I slap him once again on his already red cheek.

"Don't you dare raise your voice to me!" I stand up swiftly and head towards my closet. Grabbing a large box from the top self I bring it over to the bed. Sitting on the edge I open it gently. Pulling out the desired object I leave the lid open and stand above Squall again. His eyes widen when he sees the large sleek object in my hand. Reaching out a hand I gently run my knuckles over the red flesh. He sighs quietly and nuzzles against my cool flesh.

"Shh.. it's going to be okay. You know what you did wrong, and that's good. But you do know I have to give you your punishment right?" He nods, his eyes going downcast. Stepping back, I bring the whip back, and flicking it with barely any movement of my wrist it gives a resounding 'crack' as it meet's the brunette's pale flesh.

After the fiftieth time I finally bring the whip down for the last time. Squall's body arches. He and I both know that last one is always the hardest. I make sure of it. For it is the last one, and must place itself in Squall's mind so he doesn't make any more mistakes in the future. Each time the number goes up by ten. But the last blow I just delivered was for him crying as the whip slashed his skin. He knows he's not supposed to cry. The only tears I want to see are the ones that weep from his body. The red rivulets running down his taught stomach in an imitation of his tears that he is forced to keep bottled up inside.

Blood seeps out of the cuffs where Squall's wrists have rubbed against the sharp metal. I warned him against it before, but does he ever listen? Oh well, it's not a big enough deal to punish him for it, since he's already punishing himself by pulling his wrists every time he arches.

"You'll stay here for the night. But I want you back in your own dorm by the time I wake up. Understand?" Squall nods his head slightly. "I love you Squall. With all my heart." Smiling in appreciation at the beautiful sight laid out before me, I quickly get out of the soggy bed and bending over the lovely brunette I place my bloody lips over his. My tongue invades his mouth, and I notice him fight not to pull away from the taste of his cum and blood in his own mouth.

Gently unlocking the cuffs, I bring his arms down to rest the sore limbs on top of his equally sore chest. Giving his lush lips one last savouring lick I stride out of the dorm and go to rest in the room next to mine (one of my friends who lets me share the dorm when he's out. And knowing that he has a certain 'appointment' with one of his lady friends I know he's in her dorm tonight).

I know Squall will be gone by the time I wake up and go to my own room. The sheets will also be fresh and crisp before Squall leaves. I've already told him before to clean up after himself. I think he burns the sheets once he gets the chance to, I've never cared to ask. It's not like I care what he does with them. As long as he cleans my room up before I go in there. I hate the smell of day old blood.


	7. Treating The Wounds

Chapter 7: Treating the Wounds  
  
[Squall]  
  
Going to the Infirmary wasn't an option. I wasn't going to show the doctor my wounds, it would be obvious as to how they got inflicted. But I did have a few potions and such in my dorm. I just have to clean up a bit first, Dylan doesn't like his room to be messy (even if he did cause half of the mess), so I make sure to clean it up. I'll worry about my own shower when I get back to my dorms, hopefully undetected. I couldn't afford letting anyone see me like this.  
  
[Seifer]  
  
Walking down the halls, with my hands in my coat pockets, I tried to shake of the feeling of dread. Like something was going to happen or has already happened.  
  
The sound of a door opening makes my head raise in acknowledgement. My eyes widen when I see Squall come out of someone's dorm room, and then narrow at the state he was in. The room he had just left had to have been Dylan's. Who else would cause all those bloody marks?  
  
Walking stealthily I sneak up behind Squall until I'm directly behind him, and quickly set my pace to match his. I walk by his side for a few seconds before he finally notices me.  
  
"Seifer! Wh-what are you doing here?" I shake my head, avoiding the question (since I was basically searching for him any way). "Where are you going to treat those wounds?" Squall's stormy grey eyes widen slightly, as though just realizing that he was in full display before me. And there was nothing he could say to cover it up.  
  
Chestnut strands block my vision of his eyes when he looks at the floor intently. "I'm going back to my place." "I'll come with you." He shakes his head in defeat and continues along his attended path. My long strides easily match his stumbled pace. It's obvious Dylan did something to him earlier. I can see the pain in his eyes, no matter how hard he tries to hide it. I wish I knew how I could convince him to dump Dylan. The bastard isn't good enough for Squall.  
  
Finally arriving at Squall's dorm, I stand by while he types in his access code. The door opens smoothly and Squall waves me in first before entering himself. Seating myself on the bed, I watch Squall reach into his dresser drawer and pull out a medical kit. He sets it on the dresser and heads towards the bathroom. The sound of water running quickly reaches my ears, and I lean back comfortably on the bed for a long wait. Knowing that Squall would probably spend more time thinking then washing himself.  
  
* *  
  
Damn, it's been two hours! No one takes that long! Even Squall wouldn't take that long to think if he knows I'm here. Standing up from the bed, I walk briskly towards the bathroom. Testing the knob, I find it unlocked, and I open the door slowly. Not really knowing what to expect on the other side.  
  
"Squall!" I gasp. My eyes are glued to Squall's naked body, shivering from the cold spray beating down on him as he huddles in the corner of the tub. His knees drawn up to his chin, and his arms tightly hugging the long limbs. A small whimper snaps me from my daze. Rushing over to the tub, I quickly turn off the spray. Sighing sadly, I place one arm underneath his bent knees and another behind his back. Picking him up carefully I head towards the large bed. Not trusting him to stand long enough for me to dry him off. Placing him carefully on the soft sheets, I grab a navy blue comforter from the closet and gently tuck it around his small shivering frame.  
  
A quiet "thank you" makes me smile. I nod my head in acknowledgment, and move to get the first aid kit from a top the dresser. When I reach Squall again I find him breathing steadily, his eyes shut in long awaited sleep. Smiling softly, I pull the comforter away from his small form and kneel down to begin applying the bandages and peroxide.  
  
With most of his chest covered in sterile white bandages, I move down to inspect any other injuries he may have. I grimace slightly, when I see a small wound on his flaccid penis. My brows furrowed in anger, but I quickly quence the bubbling hat withing my in fear of waking up Squall by my outraged cries.  
  
Lightly taking a cotton ball I soak it with peroxide, and gently place it over the wound. I let the disinfecting liquid soak into the cut, before I pull the cotton ball away and toss it into the waste basket.  
  
I check over him one last time, making sure I didn't miss any wounds or minor scratches. Seeing none left, I sigh tiredly and lye down beside Squall, making sure to put some distance between us so I don't aggravate his wounds. Pulling the large comforter back over us, I take one last glance at Squall's content face and close my own eyes off from the world.  
  
[Squall]  
  
My senses slowly return to me as bright sunlight flashes across my closed lids. Surprisingly I don't feel that bad. With the way I had been hurt I really thought I would have to stay in bed for another two days at least. Wait a minute.. Seifer. He must have healed me! I must have been really tired to forget that. He did a pretty good job too.  
  
"I see your finally awake." Blinking away excess sleep, I focus on Seifer standing beside the bed. Getting up slightly, I recline on my elbows. The cotton sheets sliding down my body to pool around my waist. Seifer frowns slightly, but I find my vision blocked when he throws a pile of clothes at me. "Put these on. When your done we'll get something to eat."  
  
[Seifer]  
  
Not again! Why do we always manage to go to the cafeteria when Dylan is there? He's already seen us, so there's nothing I can do. Unfortunately Zell and Irvine don't look like they'll be appearing in the cafeteria anytime soon to save us. "Squall!" Dylan's cold brown gaze holds mine until Squall brakes the connection by walking in front of me to go to Dylan. I can't believe that! Even after the state that Dylan had left him in, Squall was still willing to go back to him! When was he going to learn? Just because someone loves you (or supposedly they do), it doesn't give them a right to hit you!  
  
Luckily my superb medic skills healed Squall enough to be able to withstand the large bear hug that Dylan is giving Squall at the moment. Striding over to them I hold back the growl that was building in my throat. "Don't you think you've harmed him enough? Or did you forget about all those wounds that you inflicted?" Dylan's thick eyebrows raise, but quickly narrow in anger. Turning back to Squall I hear him hiss "What the hell? Did you tell him bitch?" I clench my teeth, seething inside. But I can't help the spark of hope that's building inside of me. Maybe Squall will finally get rid of him.  
  
The brunette tenses. Ducking his head, he nods slightly. A small blush of shame spreading across his high cheekbones. I frown slightly, waiting for Dylan's response. Of all the things I'd expected, a large bundle of Squall hurdling at me was not one of them. We crash to the floor with a large thud. I make sure to keep Squall above me as I take the brute of the hit. The man in my arms gasps slightly. Obviously he hadn't expected this either. Unfortunately no one else was in the cafeteria, so no one witnessed the attack.  
  
"I don't want to see you again! If I find out that you've told anyone else I'll kill you!" His eyes flash. I surpass a shudder at the absolute hate and madness in his eyes. Squall's body shakes within my arms as Dylan turns and walks steadily out of the cafeteria. Out of the Garden. Out of our lives forever. Thank Hyne!  
  
Squall's body brakes out in sobs. I hold him tightly, and gently pick him up to carry him to a more private room. Don't want anyone else to witness the lion's tears. Squall wouldn't want anyone else to see him at his worst. Luckily he's let me in enough that he knows he can let himself go with me.  
  
"Shh.. come on Squall. It's going to be alright. You'll be happier without him. I'll make sure of that." But the brunette had already shut his eyes in exhaustion. Amazing how much sleep a person needs when their going through tough times. 


	8. Double Meanings

Dylan is a fictional character. To those that are named Dylan, or know a 

Dylan, please do not take offence. I never realized I actually had to state

that. I guess not everyone is smart enough to realize the obvious...

Chapter 8: Double Meanings

Squall

He left me.. I should have known. I thought he loved me. Is that the way it works? Leave the ones you love? Break their hearts in two, and walk out the door without looking back? I can't believe he tossed me like that. I was lucky that Seifer took the most impact, the force of Dylan's throw probably would have really hurt other wise. I hope Seifer's okay though. I wish he wasn't involved in all this. I don't want to involve other people in my private life.

"Squall? You okay now?" Looking over at Seifer, from my reclining position on the bed, I frown slightly. "Yeah I know. But I meant physically." Oh.. doing a mental check list of anything that could be hurt, I nod my head to show that there was nothing wrong with my body. Besides the obvious bandages that I already have on. Seifer sighs and looks down at his lap. Smiling slightly he turns to face me "I can completely heal you now that Dylan won't be questioning how you got healed. Would you like that?" Confused for a minute, I suddenly remember that Seifer had not used magic on me because Dylan is always questioning me when one of my bruises disappear. He always liked to see me marked as his. So after his bout of anger when I healed it with magic, I didn't bother using it anymore. But now that he's gone.. "Sure."

Seifer walks over to the dresser to grab the GF sphere (we don't keep them junctioned to us all the time since it eats away at our memories). Drawing Ifrit from the red sphere, Seifer put it back into the drawer and walked back over to the bed. Sitting down beside me, he placed his glowing hand on top of my chest. A sudden burst of heat within me causes me to gasp. Seifer smiled "I'll have you good as new in no time." Letting out a small smile of my own, I lean back comfortably into the headboard, while Seifer worked his magic on my sore muscles and bones.

Seifer

Seeing Squall's lids close as he relaxed and let me use Curaga, I smiled slightly at how peaceful he looked for once. It was good that Dylan left, hell, it's excellent! But I know that Squall really thinks he loves him and vice versa. So he's probably heart broken right now. I promise to help him through it though. I'll be there for him when no one else will. I'll always be there for him. I just wish he would realize that.

"Squall?" How long had I sat here with my hand on his chest while he slept? I didn't even realize the slow and steady rise of his chest until just now. At least he'll be able to escape for a little while. Hopefully he's feeling a little better tomorrow.

"How did you sleep?" I asked the brunette resting comfortably on the soft bed. "Better then usual." Smiling I made my way over to Squall, placing a silver tray on top of his thighs. "Hope you still like cinnamon porridge for breakfast." Squall smiled slightly. I knew he still had a soft spot for the stuff, personally I detest anything I can't actually chew. But whatever Squall likes, I'll be sure to give it to him. "Of course I still like it. It's been awhile though." Eyebrows scrunching in thought, I know the reason why it's been awhile. "Hey, don't bother thinking about it. I'll give you whatever you want now." Smoke-blue eyes crinkle slightly, in the typical, Squall-smile. "Thanks, Seifer." Ahh, the wonders of double meaning. "No prob." Anything for you.

Squall

I knew he caught on to my double meaning. I just feel so... I don't know. I like knowing that he'll be there for me no matter what. But I know I shouldn't rely on him to much. In case.. in case he leaves. Like everyone else. I know it's a childish fear, and I shouldn't think that of everyone who tries to get close to me, but I can't help it. I was basically brought up thinking that, so that's what I believe. I'm trying to forget that lesson I taught myself when I was just a child, but sometimes it can be so hard. Especially when someone proves me right by leaving.

Maybe Seifer's different. No, he is different. He's always been different from the others. You can't classify him into any category, he can sometimes take you by surprise by doing something that might seem totally out of character. And I'm the same way. I don't do it often, but I do manage to surprise some people. I don't always answer 'whatever' to every question that has something to do with my personal life. I just don't like talking about it, is all. But sometimes.. I just feel like collapsing on the floor and laughing my ass off, for no apparent reason. That doesn't mean I do it.. but still, I feel like I would like to at times. Maybe if I was more like Selphie, or Zell even, then I could do spontaneous stuff like that. But I have a reputation to uphold. And I also find it hard to let myself go like that. Let my guard down. Leave myself so open that anyone can harm me. I don't think Seifer would ever do that, but there's still a chance. There's always a chance of getting hurt... maybe that's what Seifer's been trying to tell me. If I leave myself open.. can I trust Seifer not to hurt me?


	9. Silver and Black Wolf

Chapter 9: Silver and Black Wolf

Seifer

It's been four weeks now, and Squall has made quite a bit of progress. He's still angry at himself for not being able to fully put up that icy facade, but he's getting there. I don't really care what he does either way, just so long as he still opens up to me. Although I don't like seeing him push other people away, it is a nice feeling to know that Squall trusts me enough to let himself be free like that.

We haven't talked about Dylan this entire time, it's kind of a taboo subject now. If he doesn't mention it, then I'm not going to bring it up. Although sometimes I really feel like punching something every time I see Squall flinch at something that reminds him of Dylan. He still doesn't accept casual touch, but I don't think he ever will. He's not the kind of person that's touchy feely. I'm the same way. Well, basically. I do like the occasional touch, but I still don't appreciate the way Selphie or Zell grab onto me sometimes. It can get to be really annoying.

All of Squall's bruises and cuts have healed. He still has a few nasty looking scars, but there's nothing we can do about them since he wasn't allowed to heal them in time, before they started to leave an impression on his skin. It's an ugly reminder of his past, but maybe it'll help him to see that lovers aren't supposed to hurt you like that. And if they do, then you have to get the hell out of there, before it gets worse. Too bad we all couldn't learn that lesson long before it happens. Who ever thinks that their boyfriend is going to beat them? And if someone like Squall loves someone so unconditionally, then their blind to the fact that something's going on that shouldn't be.

I think I'm helping Squall to see that. I think he knows now that Dylan did love him, but his love for Squall wasn't a healthy one. It was one of obsession, and dominance. Not true love at all. And Squall only loved him because he was being brain washed into thinking that only Dylan could provide him with the things that he needed. He never knew that he could be hugged without being punished for it later with a beating.

I've hugged him a couple of times. He sometimes wakes up with nightmares, and I'm always there for him. While I'm cradling him he tells me what happened in his dream. After he lets it all out, he's able to fall back to sleep. I've also been used as a human pillow plenty of times. I know Squall's the type of person that likes physical contact, even though he would never admit to it. So I help him out with that anytime he wants or needs it. I usually wait a little while until he's fully asleep, then I get into a more comfortable position. I've learned not to stay like that while sleeping, creates a hell of a neck ache. Too bad Squall's not good at massaging. Heh..

I also think I'm starting to understand the looks Irvine kept giving me whenever I used to talk about Dylan not deserving Squall, and Squall deserving better then that. I never thought I would actually like Squall in more then a platonic way. I guess because I never got aroused at the sight of him before. Though, that might have been because of the stress going on around us. I didn't really have the time or energy to question my sexuality and whether or not I like Squall. But how can I not? He's the most beautiful creature I've ever seen. I didn't even know he had a tattoo until he showed me one day when we were talking about piercings (which I have on my navel) and tattoos, he ended up showing me his. I think that was the first time I actually felt attracted to Squall.

Flashback Two weeks earlier

"What do you think about piercings?" Raising my eyebrow at the odd question, I decide to humor the brunette.

"I like them."

"Do you have any?" Smirking slightly, I nod. Pulling my forest green tee by the hem, I lift it slightly to show my washboard abs and pierced navel. A small golden hoop with a sparkling moonstone in the centre resting comfortably just above my navel. I always thought it looked nice. Reminded me of something, but I can't seem to remember what..

"That's really nice looking." Smiling at the compliment, I nod in agreement.

"Do you like tattoos too?"

"Yeah. I've always wanted to get one, but I don't really know what I want. Do you have one?" I ask, thinking the whole time that the 'perfect solider' wouldn't have any tattoo. My eyes widen considerably, when Squall turns away from me and begins to unbuckle his belt (only one this time).

"Umm.. what are you doing?" He looks back at me, chestnut strands obscuring his slightly rosy cheeks.

"Showing you." Nodding, I wave to let him continue. With the belt and zipper loose, Squall pulls down his navy blue jeans to affirm my assumption of him not wearing any underwear, and to reveal a small black and silver wolf on his left firm cheek. The sleek wolf is standing, head tilted back and jaws parted in a silent howl. The wolf is completely black with silver interlaced in the 'fur', making it stand out and look very realistic. And this close up, I also notice small dark green eyes. All in all, it was truly "..beautiful.." I almost sigh in disappointment when Squall pulls his jeans back up, zipping and buckling them. Turning around, I try to hold back the smirk when I catch sight of his flushed cheeks. A darker rose then before I made that comment. And I wasn't only talking about the wolf...

End flashback

Unfortunately I have yet to see that beautiful round ass again. A real pity too. Oh well, Squall's still not ready for the kind of relationship. At least.. I don't think so. I did think it was kind of strange the way he was blushing like that, and how ready he was to drop (well.. almost drop) his pants for me. Maybe there's hope for us yet. I'm sure Squall isn't totally against the idea.

Squall lives with me now. He quickly moved out of his dorm as soon as Dylan left. He told me that the room holds unpleasant memories for him, and I can believe that. I don't have much room, but it was enough to fit two beds and a few of his things. He doesn't have much to begin with.

It's kind of nice to wake up and see him sleeping so close to me (though not close enough..). And when I get dressed, there's a pleasant warmth inside of me when I see my closet filled with his clothes and mine. He isn't as neat as I thought he was, so our clothes are mixed together. It's cute to see him accidentally dressing in one of my favourite clothes (when he's done with it I don't wash it right away. I love his smell that clings to them). There a little big on him, of course, but it's makes him look vulnerable, and I just want to hug and protect him from the world, of course I can't do the former without him thinking something is meant by the innocent (okay.. maybe not so innocent) hold.

The only relief I have is knowing that Squall is gay. I used to think I was bi, but ever since that tattoo incident (if you can call it that), I know for a fact I'm strictly gay, and I only have eyes for Squall. Sure, there are others who are pretty and cute, but none can compare to the beauty that is the 'Ice Prince.'

"What are you doing?" I jump at the sudden voice that breaks the silence.

"Just thinking."

"Mmm.." Squall mutters, sitting down on the couch beside me. Looking out my window, I watch the landscape pass slowly, Garden still on the move to Esther. As soon as we land, I was planning on getting out of here with Squall to do something. There's only so much training I can take before getting bored. At first Squall was pretty rusty (what with Dylan stopping him from training as much as he used to), but he quickly improved after several training sessions, with me of course.

I tense slightly when Squall shifts on the couch and lays his head on my jean clad lap. He shifts around until he deems himself comfortable, and sighs in content. I let a small smile pass my lips at his relaxed and happy face. It's nice to see him so care free now. Of course he'll never be anything like Selphie or Zell, but he's open in his own way. I even get to see him smile sometimes, usually when I embarrass myself and he can't help but smile. Even if it is a small lift of his full lips. It still counts in my opinion.

"You do realize you spend more time in your head then I do, right?" Laughing, I run my hand threw his soft chestnut strands. He nuzzles against my lap, and I clench my teeth to try to control the upcoming hardness that I can feel building when he purrs in content. It's even worse when he doesn't know what he's doing until I point it out.

"No one could spend more time in their head then you Squall." My eyes almost tear up at the small smile that is aimed up at me.

"That's true. But your definitely getting there." Smiling brightly, I nod. It's funny how much we pick up on each others personality traits like that. I noticed he started to smirk more too. It suits him though. I've always noticed a spark of mischief in his storm blue eyes, that he's always tried to hide, until now that is. I think if he put his mind behind it, he could come up with some pretty good practical jokes. Heh.. maybe I could teach him a few things.

"Attention all SeeDs and Cadets, the Garden has now landed and we will be staying here in Esther until further notice." Quistis' voice states over the PA system. She's made a good headmaster since Cid left. He wanted Squall to do it, but Squall refused to do it and he said Quistis would be better for the job anyway. I thought it was really sweet of him.

"Finally!" Squall bursts, standing up quickly, he looks down at me from my seated position on the comfortable couch. "Well, where were going?" Frowning slightly, I try to think of something that would be fun. Heck, anything would be fun after so many weeks spent confined in here with only the Grats and T-rexes for company.

"How about we get the gang together and go shopping? And then maybe we'll go out later tonight and do something else." Squall nods, happy to be out of the Garden and in the fresh air for awhile. I know he doesn't seem like the person that would enjoy shopping, but he actually loves to buy clothes. And I think he'll always have a soft spot for tight jeans and sleek leather, you don't see me complaining though. At least he doesn't wear as many belts now. They would have been a bitch to get off. If the time ever comes to get them off quickly of course...


	10. The Club

Chapter 10: The Club

Seifer

"How about this one?" Selphie squealed, holding up a small yellow jumper.

"Umm.. Selphie, it looks exactly like the one your wearing now." Irvine states slowly, trying not to make her feel dumb.

"Of course it's not! The stitching is white!" Zell holds back a chuckle behind his gloved hand.

"Whatever you say Selphie." Selphie 'whoops' and adds the item to the large pile growing in Irvine's basket, all yellow. And one red pair of lacy panties.. I don't want to know.

"Do you think we could try this store next?" A small voice breaks through the Selphie's loud squealing. Looking over at the brunette I nod my head and smile.

"Yeah, there's a couple of things I want to get too." Squall returns the smile with a small grin and all the guys make our way towards the men's store, where we buy most of our clothes. The store has the most original name too, Sukunami. It kind of gives the store character. I catch a glimpse of the ladies going off to buy some more frilly underwear and other measly purchases, before I enter the store following the others.

Traveling through the isles, Squall and I are ecstatic at the amount of leather and tight tops. Both being a favourite of ours. We grin at each other, and separate to go search the store.

Browsing through the leather pants, I find an excellent pair that would look awesome on Squall. Putting it on my arm with my other purchases I make my way to the change room. Something catches my eye, and I head over to the rack. Taking the sheer long sleeved shirt I grin wickedly as I put it with my other gift for Squall. Hopefully he'll agree to wear them.

"Hey, about time Seifer. We've been waiting here forever."

"Zell, it's only been two minutes."

"Shut up Squall. I can't help it if I'm hungry."

"We're not going to get any hotdogs. I'm sick of seeing those things. You can always get one back at Garden."

"Anyway... have any of you tried out your clothes?" Everyone shakes their head. Walking over to the bench beside the changing room I place my clothes on there. I don't need to try on anything since I know for a fact they all fit me. But I'm not so sure Squall's clothes will fit him. They may be too tight.

"Hey Squall, try this on." I toss the shirt and pants over to to him. He catches them with wide eyes.

"I'm not going to wear this!"

"Come on! There's nothing wrong with adding a little colour in your wardrobe." He huffs, and walks into the changing room, I smirk at my victory. I knew he would cave. I can't wait to see how they look on him.

"Seifer, Irvine, Zell!" Selphie's voices is loud over the quiet atmosphere of the store.

"Hey ladies." Rinoa and Quistis walk at a slower pace while Selphie barrels forward.

"Are any of you busy tonight?" We all shake our heads.

"Then lets go to this club!" I grab the red flyer out of her hands and scan it. I grin at the contents, this would be perfect for Squall's new clothes. And I'll even wear those new pair of pants I got. I'm sure Squall will like them.

"Yeah sure, we'll go. Sounds fun." It's also better then sitting at home doing nothing.

"Booya!" We shake our heads at Selphie's antics. I whip my head around when I hear the changing room door creak open. I grin wolfishly, and the other two guys whistle.

Squall steps out shyly. I almost salivate at the sight before me. Navy blue leather pants, with a hint of crystal sparkle cling to his legs nicely. His muscular thighs and calves add shape to the material. As he spins around slowly (at Irvine's orders) I almost moan at the sight of his tight ass in those pants. The material leaving nothing to the imagination. My eyes travel up further to the lean but muscular chest covered by the sleek sky blue shirt. Something that attracts your eyes even if you've never seen him in colours before. Bright colours, anyway. The material is slightly loose, and reaches his waist. I grin when I see two dusky nipples peaking through the thin shirt. His griever necklace still rests on top of his lean chest, and catches the light when he stops moving in front of us. My eyes meet his, and I smile at the light blush spread over his high cheekbones. The rest of us are speechless. I don't know about them, but I've never seen such a beautiful sight. And the blush certainly adds to that.

"You look like a slut!" All our eyes widen as we turn to see Rinoa. What the hell? He doesn't look anything like a slut. Like I always say, 'If you got it, flaunt it.' I'm glad that I taught Squall that. Why else would he always wear those leather pants with the belts? That was, of course, my doing.

Squall puts his head down, his shoulders shag. Striding over to him I pull him into a tight hug. He grips onto my shirt as he buries his head in my chest.

"Your such a bitch! I think Squall looks absolutely gorgeous. Your probably just jealous because you could never look as good as him!" Zell shouts. I smile when the rest of the orphanage gang joins in. Rinoa sobs, and runs from the store.

"Don't let the door hit your ass on the way out!" Irvine calls after her.

I shake my head when a hand is placed on my shoulder. They listen to my silent request and leave (the guys going to purchase their items before joining the girls outside the store). I tighten my grip slightly as I guide Squall back into the changing room, shutting the door behind us with my foot.

Holding Squall tightly I sit him down on the wall bench. He leans into my warmth, his form still shivering. "Squall, don't listen to her. I think you look gorgeous. And wearing these clothes by no means makes you a slut." Squall shakes his head. "Then what's wrong baby?"

"She reminded me of.." Inside I seethe in anger. Dylan. It always comes back to that bastard! "He always used to call me that. Because of what I wore and the way I acted." Squeezing Squall tightly I rest my chin on his head.

"There is nothing wrong with the way you dress. I think it makes you look sexy. And there's a huge difference between looking 'sexy' and looking or acting 'sluty'. You don't look or act sluty. So forget all those comments that he told you. They didn't mean a thing because there not true." Squall nods slightly. Grinning, I change the subject to a lighter note. "So.. are you going to wear this at the club tonight?" Squall turns his head to catch my eye.

"What club?"

"The girls were thinking of going to a club tonight. And we all agreed it wouldn't be too bad of an idea." Frowning slightly I'm quick to add, "of course if you don't want to go I'll stay behind with you." Squall smiles slightly.

"It's nice of you to offer, but I think I'll go. Anything would be better then spending another day cooped up in Garden."

Smiling I stand up, Squall follows suit, still trapped in my warm embrace. "You know, I have to change before I leave the store."

"Sure, I'll just stay here and watch." I chuckle at the dark rose that jumps to the surface of Squall's cheeks. Scowling slightly, trying to hide the blush, he shoos me out of the dressing room. "Fine, fine. Ruin all my fun." I smile when I hear him let out a huff, glad that I could bring him to laughter (well, almost) after what he had just been forced to remember.

Sitting down on the bench I only have to wait five minutes before Squall steps out of the dressing room. "Took you long enough." I smirk when Squall just gives me a look. "Come on, lets go. I want to go do some other shopping for the club." Squall matches his steps with mine as we make our way throughout the mall.

NO POV

A loud, pulsating base echoes around the large room. Overhead lights are turned down low, casting supernatural shadows on the grinding dancers below. Round cheap wooden tables cluster on he far wall. Away from the dance floor, but close enough to feel the heat and sweat that radiates and pools there. One large table hold six people, the seventh standing at the bar, trying to call the bartender's attention.

A tall blonde women sits straight back in her seat, not yet relaxed by the alcohol. Her long flowing midnight blue dress sparkles in the lights. Her long blonde hair is tied back in a tight bun, but will soon become undone as the night progresses.

A short brunette wears a bright yellow miniskirt and a tight peach tee. She bounces in her chair, excited beyond belief. And she's not even drunk. Her short brown hair is flipped in it's usual style. Her friendly eyes sparkle in delight.

A petite brunette with fake creamy highlights sits in between the blonde and the other smaller brunette. Her face is set in an unpleasant scowl, she probably hasn't gotten her way again. She wears layered blues, and no one's quite sure if she's wearing a dress, a miniskirt or biker shorts.

A large black cowboy hat identifies the man sitting beside the blonde women. His long auburn hair loosely tied back, with a string of leather, cascades down his shoulders. A tight pale brown muscle shirt brings out the man's tan and slim muscles remarkably well. Long legs enclosed in loose black jeans that tighten beautifully around his muscular thighs. An easy smile is splayed across his honey coloured lips.

A shirt spiky blonde bounces in his seat next to the smallest brunette. Their amount of energy combined almost wearing out the others around them. A form fitting blue shirt brings out his already bright eyes and his bulging biceps. Baggy navy jeans are loose on his short and slim legs. A large smile seems to be permanently fixed on the teen's face.

A rugged tall blonde is comfortably slumped in his chair. His hair is loose, and for once the gel is no where in sight. His bangs are just long enough to sweep his eyes, casting the beautiful jade into shadows. A tight forest green muscle tee brings out his bright eyes, and shows of his muscular torso. His long legs are comfortable inside form-fitting leather pants. His muscles bulge when he shifts in his sheet and crosses his ankle over his knee, touching the other man's hip beside him. A mysterious smirk can be seen on his creamy lips. The blonde's eyes flash towards the man beside him. His smirk slowly changes into a loving smile. The man beside him turns to face the blonde, seeing his smile, the brunette's lips curl upwards in a smile of his own. Not realizing, or not seeing the love that pours from the man sitting next to him. But he does feel the protectiveness and safety that the blonde offers him when he curls his muscular arm around the young man's shoulders. The brunette leans into it, his smile growing.

Seifer

I try to stifle the smile that I feel grow when Squall places his head on my shoulders, leaning into my embrace. Hearing him sigh in content, I gain confidence and pat my lap with my free hand. His slim eyebrows scrunch in thought, before he hesitantly seats himself on my lap. Wrapping my other arm around him he shifts to get more comfortable before resting his head in the crook of my neck. Silky chocolate hair brushing against my lips when he lifts his head to look me in the eye.

"Is this okay?" Everything's okay when your in my arms. Nothing could be wrong with the feelings you give me.

"Of course it's okay." Squall smiles and comfortably rests his head against my neck. I surpass the shudder I feel creeping up on me when the brunette's warm breath ghosts across my skin.

The others soon leave the table when the music changes to their liking. Squall fidgets in my lap. Thinking he's uncomfortable I move to unwrap my arms from him. He leans into my chest, and I smile slightly when I feel one of his fingers tapping on my chest in time to the music. "Let's go." He smiles against my chest, and moves to stand up gracefully.

Following him to the dance floor I watch him dance before I join him. I feel too big and okward, compared to his graceful moves, his small hips swaying sensually. His eyes are closed, focusing more on the sound and vibration of the music. His eyes flicker open to look into mine. Smiling, he tilts his head back slightly. And obvious invitation to come nearer. I smirk and for once, choose to obey him.

Our bodies slide together, creating a scene that could only be described as scandalous if it weren't for the many others in the club dancing in ways that belong under the sheets and not out in the open. I gasp when Squall rubs his ass against my slightly raised thigh. Through the thin material of the leather I feel his warmth seep threw, a welcome sensation pooling in my groin when his ass comes dangerously close to my crotch. Spreading my hands on his flat stomach we move up and down in a motion that could closely be described as sex. Only with all our clothes on. And what a pity too. My thoughts are completely wiped from my mind when Squall deliberately rubs against me. I moan out loud and pull him closer to me. He tenses slightly, and I fear that I have pushed him too far. When I feel him tremble against me I look up over his shoulder to see a large man with cold brown eyes staring at us with absolute hatred.

I push Squall behind me when Dylan strides toward us. He catches my by surprise when his fist connects with my jaw. I growl low in my throat and quickly return the blow.


	11. Guess Who's Back

Sorry for the long wait. I was just wondering how to do the fight scene, so I apologize if it isn't very.. well, whatever a fight scene is supposed to be like :)

Edit 01/12/05: NC17 content has been removed. If writing seems disjointed, that is why. For full version, go to various websites. Just search for my pen name.

Chapter 11: Guess Who's Back...

Squall

My eyes snap open and I tense in surprise. There, standing before me is a sight that I had hoped to never see again; Dylan. I tremble in fear and anticipation when he strides towards us, Seifer quickly pushes me behind him. I gladly accept the protection. I gasp when Dylan strikes Seifer in the jaw, I grab Seifer, making sure he doesn't fall. He pushes me further back with his hand, and growling slightly he returns the blow full force.

Seifer

I grin when Dylan stumbles backwards, but he (unfortunately) manages to catch his footing before he falls. His cold brown eyes stare at me intently. I lift my lip in a sneer when his glance moves behind me, to the trembling brunette.

"Imagine seeing you here Squall." The stupid bastard is acting like he didn't just punch me, and I didn't just give him a blow hard enough to leave a black eye. My eyes widen in surprise when Squall steps up beside me, his lithe form is no longer trembling, and I almost smile in pleasure at the cold glare that is directed at Dylan. I never thought he'd be able to over come his fears and face Dylan like this.

"A pleasure I'm sure." Squall replies coldly. I resist the urge to growl stupidly when Dylan's eyes sweep over the brunette's form leisurely. "Oh, but it is. Didn't I tell you that you would look good in blue?" "I don't particularly recall that conversation." "Hmm.. maybe we can remedy that." Dylan steps forward, frowning I move to protect Squall again. Squall sakes his head and gently pushes me away. "I need to do this Seifer." His voice is pitched low enough for only me to hear. I nod mutely, not trusting my voice. I don't want to see him get hurt...

Squall

I smile inside when Seifer accepts my admission. I'm glad he understands. I know he wants to protect me, he doesn't want to see me hurt. But he can't always be there to protect me, and I have to stop relying on him to keep me safe. I know now that he'll always be there for me, but I have to learn to take care of myself. I don't want to end up like another Rinoa.

"I see you still haven't ditched the blonde." Like I would willingly leave Seifer. Dylan comes closer, trying to intimidate me with his height. Yeah right, even Seifer knows by now that I can't be intimidated so easily. But Dylan never took the time to get to know me. "You know you can do better then him," his voice is pitched low, sounding almost comforting. "Why don't you come with me. I'm sorry for the way I treated you Squall, but I've learned by lesson. I won't ever hurt you again. Please Squall." I tense when Dylan places a large hand on my shoulder. I count to five slowly, trying to calm myself from the unwanted reaction to his closeness. Come on Squall, your Shiva's bitch, you can't be scared. You have to stop trembling. I sigh quietly and resist the urge to take a step back. Knowing that if I do, Dylan will have won his little game.

Even though I tremble inside, trying to surpass the images.. the memories of my times spent with him, I know my face is emotionless. Even if my eyes betray me, Dylan was never able to read my emotions through my eyes anyway. And in that sense, I have the advantage.

"I'm not coming back to you. I'm with Seifer now." My voice is steady and low. Not a nervous tremor like I thought it was going to be. "Seifer? You gotta be kidding?! I'm ten times the man he'll ever be. I bet I can show you more pleasure then you've ever been shown with him, I can take you to the moon and back." The pure nonsense of his words bring me away from my memories. To the moon and back? Who the hell says that kind of thing?

"I don't think so Dylan. I'm never coming back to you, so go fuck and abuse somebody else." My gaze flickers to Seifer for a brief moment, trying to communicate to him that I want to leave. He understands and nods, but no sooner does my gaze return to Dylan that I find his fist flying at me. I rear back slightly, and the blow that was meant for my eye lands on my slack jaw. I grunt escapes me when I feel the bone break.

Seifer

Anger bubbles up inside me when I see Squall fall back into Zell's arms, luckily just reaching us to catch him. Any later and Squall probably would have had a concussion from hitting his head on the hard floor.

Seeing that Squall is safe for the moment, I leap at Dylan. He lets out a loud grunt when I punch his stomach. He bends over double when I knee him in the groin. Grabbing his head I bash his face into my raised knee, blood spurts out of his broken nose. He falls to the ground, clutching his nose and his crotch. Heh, that'll show the bastard.

"Hey! What the hell are you doing?! Get out of here!" The bartender screams at us, heading over to our area. Zell picks up Squall and follows the already exiting Rinoa, Quistis, Selphie and Irvine. Backing away from Dylan I quickly run after them.

Zell

Carrying dead weight is a lot harder then most people would think, especially when the person your carrying is taller then you. I know muscle weighs more then fat, but jeez, who knew Squall had so much muscle, he looks so skinny? Well, maybe Seifer would know.

Balancing Squall on my shoulder I follow the girls and Irvine to Seifer's black van. The gang dives into the car, while I quickly slide in, placing Squall on my lap when Seifer squeezes in after me. He sits beside me in the back seat while Quistis closes the van door. Irvine steps on the gas and the club quickly vanishes into the distance.

Looking over at Seifer I wince in sympathy when I see a rather large bruise forming on his eye. At least Seifer got plenty of shots in before we had to run. Dylan will probably be moaning in pain for weeks.

Seeing Seifer's eyes on Squall I shift him over to place him on Seifer's lap. He smiles in thanks, and maneuvers Squall so his head is resting against the blonde's shoulder and his legs are slightly bent so he can fit in the van. Seifer places his arms around him in a gentle hug and rests his head on the brunette's. His eyes close as he breathes in the smell of whatever Squall uses for shampoo. Or at least that's what I think he's doing.

I sigh quietly at the scene, glad that Squall finally has someone who cares for him deeply. Who knows him better then the rest of us do. And treats him a hell of a lot better then Dylan ever did.

Resting my head against the soft material behind me I close my eyes for the long ride back home.


	12. The Final Act to Cross Remaining Barrier...

The final chapter I'm really happy that I could complete another multi- chaptered story. I hope all my readers enjoy the ending, and the lemon that I enjoyed writing. As always, I appreciate any suggestions on how I can improve my writing, and definitely my lemon scenes. I'm still new at them, so I'm terribly sorry if there a little dull. This one does have a little different scenario compared to a lot of the other SeiferxSquall fics out there. You'll see what I mean when you get there. A lot of people have mentioned they don't see it done often ;) hint, hint 

Thanks go out to my continuous reviewers, I really appreciate the time you take to review each and every chapter. And to those readers who read 'all' of my works, I'm eternally grateful. And a lot of thanks goes out to the people who actually comment intelligently on my fics, and try to help me improve.

I really hope you enjoy the last chapter. Hopefully it meets all your high expectations. Oh yes, I forgot to mention that there's a little bit of Rinoa bashing in here, and some mention of her and her dog But who doesn't enjoy reading about that?

A few notes for this chapter: time passing Flashback Exactly what it says. Along with End Flashback There both pretty clear, so no one should be confused. When Squall says; "They came back." He means the memories. For those of you out there that can't take a subtle hint. And as always ... is a POV switch.

Edit 01/12/05 - NC17 content has been removed. If the fic seems disjointed in parts, that's the reason why. If you want to read the full story, go to or search 'Redrum'.

Now, on with the fic

Redrum

Chapter 12: The Final Act to Cross Remaining Barriers

Seifer

The ride back to Garden was pretty uneventful. Squall remained unconscious during the whole trip, and only started waking up when I put him on our bed.

"What happened?" His gaze was blurry still and only a sliver of storm blue could be seen when he looked up at me. I climbed into the bed and wrapped my arms around him.

During the ride, Zell had used Curaga on the both of us. And now that Dylan had no connections to the Garden he wouldn't be healed by any means of magic.

Looking down at Squall I raised an eyebrow questionly. "What do you remember?" He frowned slightly, trying to recall what happened.

"We were dancing and Dylan showed up."

"Do you remember what you said?"

"Yeah... What happened after Dylan punched me?" He scowls at the memory the question produces. Trailing a finger along his previously broken jaw, I try not to get too angry at remembering what Dylan did to Squall, even if I did pay him back with all those bruises and cuts I'm sure he still has.

"Zell caught you before you could fall on the ground. I beat Dylan up and we made a run for it when the bartender came to investigate." Squall watched me for a second, some how knowing that Dylan had gotten a few punches in before we ran. Deciding not to comment on my omission, he snuggles into my chest. Tucking his head beneath my chin, I tighten my grip and close my eyes.

"They came back." Not opening my lids, I pull Squall closer to me. I don't pretend not to know what he's talking about.

"They'll always be there Squall. They'll come up when you least want them. But you don't have to be afraid of them. I'll always be here for you." I feel Squall smile against me and shift until he's level with me. He leans in and wraps his lips around mine, his tongue shyly exploring the heated cavern of my mouth.

I trail a hand up his lean back, pulling his shirt up along with it. He pulls back and peels his shirt off, throwing it behind him. Following his lead, I toss my own. I trail a hand down the curves of his muscular chest, stopping at his fly. I look up and meet his heated gaze. His arms snake down my torso and quickly undo my pants with ease.

I bring my hands down to find already unbuttoned and unzipped pants. Smirking slightly, I run my hands down (as far as I can reach without moving too much) his thighs and watch him shimmy out of his tight pants. He kicks them off while I clumsily toe off my own.

Both naked now, we take the vision of each other in. His body is lean and muscular, but with how small he is and how many layers he wears, you can easily mistake him for being weak. Which he is anything but. His chest and back have no hair (just the way I like it) and the hair on his arms and legs is so fine that it looks bare. His arms are firm and muscular, from carrying the heavy gunblade (his is actually heavier then mine, but he does use it for defense more then I do). His legs are rather long, considering his shortness (not that that's a bad thing or anything. I like how I can easily cover his body with mine), but their lean and and firm thanks to the daily run that he does every afternoon.

My admiration of his body is cut off when he suddenly gets on top of me, facing my erection. My eyes focus on a detailed image painted on one of his cheeks.

Squall

The firm grip on my hips make me stop and look back at Seifer. I frown slightly when I see him gazing intently at my ass. "What are you doing?" Is there something wrong with the way it looks or something? He glances up at me, then returns to his examination. "Why did you get this?" Oh! So that's what he was looking at. I give a small smile when I remember the day I got that tattoo. "I've always wanted to get a tattoo, except, I never knew what to get. But one day you gave me the idea." He raises a blonde brow, trying to recall when he gave me the idea. I smile slightly and tell him what happened.

Flashback

Sweating and panting, I fall to my knees. Resting my weight on all fours, I try to catch my breath. I can't believe I let a 'rex sneak up on me like that. I should be more aware of my surroundings, I'm always supposed to know what's going on around me. How am I supposed to make it into SeeD if I can't even remember not to get distracted by my own monologues and pathetic feelings? Your not supposed to think when you fight, your supposed to keep your senses open, always ready for battle. Always staying one step ahead of your opponent. I can't resist the urge to growl at my own stupidity.

"Hey Leonhart, you trying to imitate one of the beasties now? You'll never be as good as me if you spend all your time on your knees." I ignore Seifer's usual taunts and innuendos as I continue to try to catch my breath. Purposely loud footsteps make their way around me to face me directly. I frown at the odd silence that takes place.

Looking up, I'm stunned at the unusual fire burning in Seifer's jade green eyes. I've seen them overcome with anger, disappointment, pride, happiness, but never with something that almost looks like lust. And never for me. He squats down in front of me, tilting his head to the side. Bright jade eyes gaze at me intently.

He places a callused finger underneath my smooth chin, tilting my head farther up. "I guess those rumors are true. You do resemble a wolf." His eyes burn into mine before he abruptly stands up and walks away, not looking back. Jade green eyes never leave my subconscious. And his words hover around the back of my mind.

End Flashback

"So that's why the odd eye colour." I nod and smile back at him.

"It's funny how some moments stick out in your mind. Even when the G.F.'s decide to take away most of your memories." I gasp when I feel his tongue sweep across the wolf.

"Why are there so many scars around it? -wait, don't answer that. I already know." I tense slightly as the memories of Dylan paying 'special' attention to that spot over and over and over again, run through my mind.

He'd always hated it since it reminded him of Seifer. I also found that it made me remember him too. And I was always thankful of that. I cherish the few memories that I have now. The tattoo was almost like a trip down memory lane. Only, it's the memories of Seifer that came back to me when I got it. My facial scar lets me remember the bad memories between Seifer and I, while the tattoo represented the good memories we had with each other (few as they were at the time). The latter soon out weighed the former, and we became friends after awhile. Dylan never liked it of course. He didn't want me hanging around other people anyway. Especially the one person who made me realize I was gay. I'll never tell him that of course, since Seifer's ego is already too big as it is.

"Hey, what's wrong? We don't have to do anything you don't want to you know." I blink out of my daze and choose to answer Seifer silently.

I quickly turn around and kiss Seifer while he's still dazed. The tangy come in my mouth traveling to his own. He pulls back only slightly, trailing his tongue to the corners of my mouth, lapping up his pearly substance.

"You like that taste?"

"It grows on you." Seifer puts both hands on my shoulders, eyes darting to try to decipher exactly what I'm feeling.

"I didn't force you into anything did I? You didn't have to swallow." My lips curve at his nervousness.

"I wanted to Seifer." He calms down somewhat, though for some reason he still looks nervous. My eyebrows shoot up in sudden realization and surprise.

"You've never done this before." Not a question but Seifer answers anyway.

"I've done it with a few women, but since Rinoa-" he shudders, "I haven't really done anything. And... your the first guy I've ever been with.. or thought about." I smile brightly and hug him. He chuckles, but returns the hug.

"How do you know what to.. do?" I look down, suddenly shy. None of the guys (though I haven't been with all that many, I can probably count them on one hand) that I've been with have ever let me fuck them. They always thought of me as too frail to do something like that to them. And Dylan just wanted to own me, so there was no way I was going to be allowed to enter him.

But before I actually started to experiment with guys, I used to just lay in bed and read those 'hot to' and several erotica books about homosexuality. "I used too read a lot." Seifer's face is blank for a second, before it changes into a leer and he smirks at me.

"So while the rest of us were studying for SeeD exams you were reading gay erotica?" I scowl at him.

"I did study. You know my marks, since you hacked into the system for it." He chuckles.

"Hey, I've always got to know what the competition is up to."

I hum softly and take my arm away from his legs. They fall to the mattress with a soft 'thump'. Seifer sits up and looks at me questionably. "What's wrong Squall?" I shake my head. Is that all I am? Will I always just be 'the competition' to Seifer? I look up when two large hands are placed on my slender shoulders.

Seifer

Shit... what did I say? I can't always tell what's wrong with just by looking at him. "Squall. What did I say?" His eyes are more grey then usual, but from his expression... I still can't tell what's wrong.

"Is that all I am?" I frown in thought, trying to go over everything I said-oh. That's what's making him depressed?

"You know we're not rivals anymore. But we're both competitive. So we'll always be competing over something." The grey in his eyes dull for a moment, replaced with a darker blue. He meets my gaze again and nods his understanding.

"Is there anything else that I said...?" I trail off. He looks uncertain for a moment, probably wondering if he should bother mentioning it. I slide my arms around him and pull him closer, letting him rest against my broad chest.

"You said you'd always be there.. but what happens when you don't want to be there and your just staying because of a promise?" Ahh, he's thinking of the 'Rinoa Fiasco.' Squall's the type of guy that keeps his promises, even if he doesn't really believe in it anymore. I admire him for the quality, but sometimes it can be a bit too much. Especially when he isn't happy keeping that promise (who could ever be happy with Rinoa? Besides her dog of course).

I always keep my promises; Knight's honor and all. But if I'm not happy then I'm not going to keep it, it's as simple as that. That's one of the many ways that I differ from Squall. I know I'll be happy with Squall. We'll obviously have our fights but we'll get through them. I just have to make sure to get Squall to tell me when he's not happy with something. Even when we were rivals he always told me the truth, and I'm sure in the future he'll make sure to tell me whenever I'm doing something annoying.

"Squall, I'll always be there for you. I mean it. This isn't going to be a repeat of your last relationship, or the one you had with Rinoa. I'm not going to hurt you -unless we're training of course- and I'm not going to try to change you." I gently push Squall back, enough to look him in the eye. "I'm happy with you, so I'm going to stay with you. We'll always have our arguments, but we wouldn't be us if we didn't. I can't promise that we'll always be in a relationship, but I can promise that I'll be there for you. Even if I die before you, I'll find a way to come back and annoy you." He smiles, storm blue eyes crinkling at the corners.

Squall leans forward, eyes closed, he presses his lips to mine in a simple kiss. "Thanks Seifer." He mumbles against me. With my free hand I reach into my nightstand's drawer and pull out the small bottle of blueberry lubricant. I'd bought it awhile ago, when I was having some fantasies about Squall and I wanted to try a few things.

Squall pulls back at the noise, looking at my hand he snorts. "I thought you didn't have any." Smirking, I hand it to him.

"I used it when I was having fantasies about a certain brunette and I wanted to try a few things out." My smirk turns into a smile when he blushes. Only a light rose high up on his cheeks, but he's so pale that it's easy to see.

I trail a finger along his heated cheek. "Are you sure this is what you want?" He grins and crawls backwards to sit between my tanned thighs.

"I'm sure." He pops the cap off and dips a finger in. Forcing myself to loosen up, I lie back and rest my head on my arms. I feel the odd sensation of something going 'in' a passage that's only meant for 'out.'

"If you would open your eyes, maybe you'd know what it is." I frown and follow his suggestion. Reclining on my elbows again, I look down and arch my eyebrows at seeing the head of his cock in my ass.

"Are you sure that's gonna fit?" He chuckles and shakes his head in amusement.

"Yes Seifer, it's going to fit. I can't believe you don't know anything about this." I look up at his face, his dark brows are slightly furrowed in the strain of holding back.

"It's not going to hurt is it?" Squall takes a deep breath, trying to get under control again. He places a slender finger underneath my chin, tilting my head up to meet his concerned gaze.

"It might at first, but if you relax, and stop clenching your ass-" he arches an elegantly shaped eyebrow in mock scolding, "it won't hurt."

"I didn't know it would feel so tight." Squall mutters breathlessly. A thought passes through my mind, causing me to chuckle. Squall looks at me, a small glimmer of hurt in his eyes.

"What?" I smile at him.

"You know that phrase, 'killing two birds with one stone'?" The hurt quickly leaves his eyes to be replaced with slight confusion. He nods for me to continue.

"I was just thinking that we basically did just that." His brows furrow as his confusion grows. "I meant we were both virgins in this area, and we both just lost it at the same time." Squall shakes his head, but a small smile of amusement at my antics plays on his lips.

"You think of the oddest things." I nod my head in agreement, causing a small chuckle to escape Squall's lips.

"Oh, fuck Squall!" My hands go up to clutch at his shoulders, my nails digging in to the creamy skin with every thrust as I try to hold on to 'something'.

I scream his name as I finally come. Squall's quieter moans are lost in mine. I untangle my legs from around him and let them fall flat on the mattress. Squall crawls back up next to me when he'spulled out. We wrap our arms around each other, not caring of the sweat or heat. Squall rests his head on my chest, darting a tongue out to lick my nipple.

I smile and kiss him on the head. Not feeling sleepy yet I turn onto my side, facing him. Squall turns also and curls his back into my chest. I smile again and curl my legs under his, wrapping my left arm around his stomach and letting him use my right one as a pillow, I let my eyes close as the full effects of heated sex finally get to me.

A few minutes pass, before I suddenly feel Squall tense in my hold. I bend the arm that's being used as a pillow and gently run my fingers through his moist and silky hair. Taking it as a silent urge to speak his mind, Squall bends his head down, letting me run my hand more freely through the dark locks. "Dylan never used to do this."

"What, hold you?" Squall gives a small shake of his head.

"No, he used to hold me. But it was different." I frown.

"How so?"

"It used to hurt. He used to hold me really tight. And when he tired of holding me, he would always tell me to go to my own room after we had sex; because he couldn't sleep with someone else in the bed." The image of Squall walking back to his room in rumpled clothes, covered in stale sweat and dried sticky come, limbs tired and sore, pained my heart.

I loosened my grip slightly, but Squall's hand on my bicep stops me. "Your not hurting me Seifer." My lips curve in a small smile and I tighten my hold. Squall gives a content sigh. I continue to brush his hair with my fingers while I close my eyes.

"Seifer?" A quiet voice pierces the night. Mumbling I turn my head slightly to see through blurry eyes, Squall; wide awake and hugging me from behind.

"Yeah?" I manage to grunt as I try to blink myself awake. Squall hesitates, but eventually decides to ask the question that's been keeping him up for several hours.

Squall

Several minutes pass until Seifer's warm breath tickles my neck in a steady rhythm. His warmth at my back is a drastic change from my past relationships. Anyone I slept with ended up having some kind of excuse that made either me or them leave the bed after sex.

Rinoa wanted to cuddle, but she snored so loud that I couldn't get to sleep. And she's the type of person that moves around a lot in her sleep. Whenever I did manage to get to sleep, I'd always wake up with bruises from her kicking in the night.

And Dylan... well I guess he was a bad decision on my part. I really thought he loved me. Maybe it was true, what Seifer said. He loved me, just in his own way. But... was that love? What I felt for him? I've read several books about it and they all say you should feel like your on a cloud (or something along those lines). I was just glad that someone could care about me and protect me.

And when he started getting rougher I thought it was because I was doing something wrong. But Seifer said that it doesn't have to be like that, and maybe it doesn't. I remember when we always trained together when we were rivals, and he would always point out my mistakes, making sure I corrected them. The only times he would hit me is when we both had blades or when things got heated and he would start punching and kicking me. But he never did it when I was injured (unless we were using our gun blades, then we would both stop if a wound became fatal). And that one time I was sick, he never bugged me once. It wasn't like he flat out ignored me, he was actually there almost all the time.

I'd always see him out of the corner of my eyes, sometimes watching me with what looked like concern. But the only time he came near me when I was sick, was when a bunch of guys were annoying me when I was walking to my dorm. Two bottles of cough syrup and Tynoel in my hand that I had just got from Dr. Kadowaki.

They were saying a bunch of shit, like 'how can the ice prince get sick when he doesn't feel anything?' Anyway, Seifer strutted over and grabbed the three of them and started yelling at them. Saying it was against the rules (he was the leader of the Discipline Comity at the time) to call underclassmen crude names. He basically just stalled them long enough for me to slip away to my room in piece and finally get rid of my pounding headache.

Looking back on it, I can't believe I didn't realize how much he cared for me even back then. He didn't show it in any obvious ways, but it was definitely there if you just looked for it. I wonder if he loved me then? And if not, does he love me now? I don't understand how I'm supposed to know if I love him. I know what it feels like to be angry, I can definitely put a name to that. Along with sadness, happiness (there's only a few times that I felt it back then, but lately I've found myself smiling more and even laughing), abandonment, and loneliness. But I can't put the name 'love' to anything I feel, since I don't really know. Maybe Seifer would know...

"Seifer?" When did he roll over? Turning over, I snuggle into his broad back. He mumble incoherently but eventually turns his head.

"Yeah?" He grunts. I hesitate when he tries to blink his way to full awareness. Maybe I should just wait? No, I'll just chicken out if I wait any longer. Thinking too much about something tends to make you a coward, at least that's what Seifer always said to me; 'If you don't come right out and say it, you'll always be hiding back and you'll be the lowest of cowards.'

"Seifer... What does love feel like?" His blonde brows shoot up in surprise; at least he's fully awake now.

"What?!" He turns around and sits up. I let my arms fall away and stay lying down, turning my face away from him. "Squall?" A pressure on my chin makes me look over at him. He cups my cheek in his large palm, forcing me to lock eyes with him. "What brought that on?" My gaze flickers from his.

"I was just thinking." I look at his face again and am surprised to find him smirking.

"You do that a lot I've noticed. So.. you want to know what love feels like?" I nod, feeling heat spread across my cheeks. Part embarrassment and part shame that I have to ask another person a question like that. Although... I guess Seifer isn't just anybody.

The mattress dips when he lies back down next to me, wrapping an arm around my waist. He starts speaking hesitantly, like he can't really put his thoughts into words, at least not the way he wants to.

"I guess... love feels different for everyone. Some people experience it like in those sappy romance novels. Others can have a bit of a.. twisted view on it." We both fall silent when we think of Dylan. "But if your trying to ask what ' I ' feel like when I'm in love... well, it's hard to put into words." I look up at him; his eyebrows are furrowed in thought and his eyes are slightly crinkled at the corners. I give a small smile when the tip of his tongue darts out to moisten dry lips.

"Hmm.. the only way I can explain it, is like an obsession almost. Their the first person I think of when I wake, and the last thing in my mind before I go to sleep. Sometimes when I'm working on something important, an image of them in certain.. distracting positions appear, even when I'm not even thinking of them at the time." There's a long pause as he tries to voice his thoughts logically.

"When I touch them, I feel protective. I feel like I want to keep them safe, I need to keep them safe. When they laugh or smile, I want to freeze the moment and relive it over and over again. Glad that I could bring them long deserved happiness." He puts his free hand to his head, pushing his bangs out of his eyes.

"Hyne! I must sound like a fucking romance novel." I smile at him and turn in his loose grip, burying my nose into his neck. Although his explanation was a little corny, it did sound like something he would truly feel. Maybe I'll find out what love feels like to me in the future. Feeling Seifer's arms go around me, I pause to think; maybe it won't be too long into the future.

"I think I could love you too Seifer." He snorts, but I feel his smile against my forehead.

"Who wouldn't?" He leans down slightly, kissing me on my scar.

"Love you." I frown in mock seriousness.

"I already know that." He laughs, pulling me closer.

"Go to sleep Squall." I smile and follow his order, even if it did come out as more of a plea (probably to stop his embarrassment from continuing).

I'll be sure to tease him in the morning about his little speech. Right now, I'm too sleepy to bother with trying to get a rise out of him. But tomorrow is a new day. And for once, I'm really looking forward to it.

-Owari-


End file.
